i understand not wanting to offend people, i get that
but, in my experience, if you tiptoe around people too much, try TOO HARD not to offend them to the point where you don’t even feel you can joke around with them, you dehumanize them, make them feel excluded. if you wear kid gloves around them all the time it makes them feel like a burden or highlights the fact that they’re different, more so than you would’ve if you had joked and teased a bit.
of course there’s a limit to that, and of course this doesn’t apply to everyone, but look I’ve had 3 friends go through cancer and i used to be friends with a deaf girl, and they all appreciated when you treated them like people rather than delicate pieces of glass, they used to joke about themselves just to make it more comfortable for other people to joke with them because they got so tired of people treating them so nicely all the time and putting them on this “so brave” predistal.
that deaf girl i knew? her favorite joke to tell people when she first met them was “why did the chicken cross the road? I don’t know I didn’t hear the rest of the joke” and sometimes it would make people so uncomfortable that she had to tell them she was joking and to loosen up.
i see tumblr demonize offensive comedy so much, it all just seems like extreme censorship to me. yeah there’s dickwads who take it too far, but a lot of the time comedy is how we get past things, it’s how we feel better or make our problems seem small.
i dunno, just felt like spitting that out.